Post by Kolakube on Aug 6, 2004 11:22:33 GMT -5
He's the biggest c*** he knows.
Hello Matt. Do you like Charlie?:
Well, he doesn't wash his jeans enough, but apart from that he's a good guy.
When were you first introduced to Charlie?:
When I saw him at an audition. He came and auditioned for me and James. Bell-bottomed jeans, stupid jacket, big eyebrows... I actually thought he was Dutch.
Does Charlie make you feel better when you're tired?:
Charlie's normally in his room watching a DVD, so no.
Does Charlie keep the band going?:
Charlie... hang on. You fucker. I know what you're doing. (long pause) I think we all play a vital role in the band.
You love golf! What else do you have in common with Jimmy Tarbuck?
I dont know, but I'm sure I look as much of a c*** as he does on the gold course. Isn't he Zoe Ball's dad? (long pause) Oh yeah. Johnny Ball. That's the one. I saw Bobby Ball, of Cannon and Ball fame, on TV the other ady. Bleating on about, "Oh, it's not like it was in the old days." Of course it's not, you old fuck! The old days were shit!
If you could beat anyone to death with your golf club, who would you choose?
I don't really have any enemies at the moment. he nearest I'd come would be Lostprophets. Because they talk shit and I have no idea why people thin they're good. They've just covered a Rachel fucking Stevens song! And they slag US off! Basically they get put down for being the pretty boys of rock, and they can't have a go at anyone in the rock world so they pick a pop group. Why not have a go at some of your peers? Oh, have a go aat a pop group. That's a difficult target. Well done, mate. Twat. Classic bullying mentality. The abused becomes the abuser.
Comedy celebrities like yourself always say they hate poncey bars and that they prefer proper pubs. And yet you often seem to be in those bars. Can you and I go into business and invent a celebrity pub?
What a fucking great idea! Fruit machines, pork scratchings... you're right though - I always hated those places but then as Busted took off I realised that those were the only pla es I could go where I'd not get started on by some idiot who thinks it'd be funny to punch Matt from Busted. I have no sanctuary. Which makes me wonder: am I a c***? What has happened to me?
Good use of the word 'sanctuary' there, Matt:
Thanks. Did you notice how I just slipped that in?
Anyway:
celebrity pub. Let's do it. I've always fancied owning a pub. Check us out! Tell you what, since I moved away from home ALL the pubs I used to go to have shut down. It's a nightmare!
What does that tell you about your alcohol intake?
They may have lost some business. But I do enjoy a beer. A lot of people say that binge-drinking is alcoholism, don't they? But I'm not a binge drinker, I'm a regular drinker. Perhaps it boils down to one long binge.
Are Busted splitting up after the next tour?
You know what, so much bollocks goes around about that sort of thing. Busted are not splitting up after the next tour. We are happy, we are getting along fucking great.
Are Busted going to stay together forever?
Well, no. I wouldn't say that.
So, presuming you don't split up before, then you WILL split up after the next tour.
We will split up eventually. After quite a few more tours.
But it'll still be after the next tour:
Peter, I know what you're getting at. What do you want me to say?
I want a pull-quote, Matt:
Alright, here's your pull-quote: "Busted are splitting up after the next tour". Happy? Put that in big letters on your page. Well done.
The tour will coincide with a live album. Doesn't touring a live album defy all logic?
We'll be going, 'You bought it on CD - now we're going to play it exactly the fucking same as you heard it on the record. And you're going to fucking like it!" Thing is, touring's the best thing for me - I'd tour a Bside if I could. A live album, a live DVD... that's the stuff you can keep forever and show your grandkids.
You could also show your grandkids the huge pile of cash you make from live albums and DVDs:
Well, that's the idea. That's the other good thing about touring. You earn a packet. A lot. Quite a substantial amount.
Are you happy about contributing to Rip-Off Britain, Matt?
Do you know what? One thing that I never wanted to fucking do, and we're doing it: we're going to be selling those stupid blow-up guitars. Because if we don't, the guys outside will, and they're earn a packet instead of us. But we are such c***s. I am the biggest c*** I know. I am selling blow-up Busted guitars at my gigs. We've sold out to rubber guitars. £9 for a glorified balloon. What c***s.
Hello Matt. Do you like Charlie?:
Well, he doesn't wash his jeans enough, but apart from that he's a good guy.
When were you first introduced to Charlie?:
When I saw him at an audition. He came and auditioned for me and James. Bell-bottomed jeans, stupid jacket, big eyebrows... I actually thought he was Dutch.
Does Charlie make you feel better when you're tired?:
Charlie's normally in his room watching a DVD, so no.
Does Charlie keep the band going?:
Charlie... hang on. You fucker. I know what you're doing. (long pause) I think we all play a vital role in the band.
You love golf! What else do you have in common with Jimmy Tarbuck?
I dont know, but I'm sure I look as much of a c*** as he does on the gold course. Isn't he Zoe Ball's dad? (long pause) Oh yeah. Johnny Ball. That's the one. I saw Bobby Ball, of Cannon and Ball fame, on TV the other ady. Bleating on about, "Oh, it's not like it was in the old days." Of course it's not, you old fuck! The old days were shit!
If you could beat anyone to death with your golf club, who would you choose?
I don't really have any enemies at the moment. he nearest I'd come would be Lostprophets. Because they talk shit and I have no idea why people thin they're good. They've just covered a Rachel fucking Stevens song! And they slag US off! Basically they get put down for being the pretty boys of rock, and they can't have a go at anyone in the rock world so they pick a pop group. Why not have a go at some of your peers? Oh, have a go aat a pop group. That's a difficult target. Well done, mate. Twat. Classic bullying mentality. The abused becomes the abuser.
Comedy celebrities like yourself always say they hate poncey bars and that they prefer proper pubs. And yet you often seem to be in those bars. Can you and I go into business and invent a celebrity pub?
What a fucking great idea! Fruit machines, pork scratchings... you're right though - I always hated those places but then as Busted took off I realised that those were the only pla es I could go where I'd not get started on by some idiot who thinks it'd be funny to punch Matt from Busted. I have no sanctuary. Which makes me wonder: am I a c***? What has happened to me?
Good use of the word 'sanctuary' there, Matt:
Thanks. Did you notice how I just slipped that in?
Anyway:
celebrity pub. Let's do it. I've always fancied owning a pub. Check us out! Tell you what, since I moved away from home ALL the pubs I used to go to have shut down. It's a nightmare!
What does that tell you about your alcohol intake?
They may have lost some business. But I do enjoy a beer. A lot of people say that binge-drinking is alcoholism, don't they? But I'm not a binge drinker, I'm a regular drinker. Perhaps it boils down to one long binge.
Are Busted splitting up after the next tour?
You know what, so much bollocks goes around about that sort of thing. Busted are not splitting up after the next tour. We are happy, we are getting along fucking great.
Are Busted going to stay together forever?
Well, no. I wouldn't say that.
So, presuming you don't split up before, then you WILL split up after the next tour.
We will split up eventually. After quite a few more tours.
But it'll still be after the next tour:
Peter, I know what you're getting at. What do you want me to say?
I want a pull-quote, Matt:
Alright, here's your pull-quote: "Busted are splitting up after the next tour". Happy? Put that in big letters on your page. Well done.
The tour will coincide with a live album. Doesn't touring a live album defy all logic?
We'll be going, 'You bought it on CD - now we're going to play it exactly the fucking same as you heard it on the record. And you're going to fucking like it!" Thing is, touring's the best thing for me - I'd tour a Bside if I could. A live album, a live DVD... that's the stuff you can keep forever and show your grandkids.
You could also show your grandkids the huge pile of cash you make from live albums and DVDs:
Well, that's the idea. That's the other good thing about touring. You earn a packet. A lot. Quite a substantial amount.
Are you happy about contributing to Rip-Off Britain, Matt?
Do you know what? One thing that I never wanted to fucking do, and we're doing it: we're going to be selling those stupid blow-up guitars. Because if we don't, the guys outside will, and they're earn a packet instead of us. But we are such c***s. I am the biggest c*** I know. I am selling blow-up Busted guitars at my gigs. We've sold out to rubber guitars. £9 for a glorified balloon. What c***s.
