Never Let The Past Get You Down

[Kolakube]

Seeing as I have writers block on the other fic, I've started this to help motivate my mind!!!

[Kolakube]

"I hate goddamn school," I shouted, slamming my locker door shut. This action revealed 'him' standing there staring at me, a dopey grin on his face. His black hair fell down his forehead, spiked up slightly at the back. A silver eyebrow bar through his right eyebrow and a small silver hoop earring in each ear. His school shirt untucked from his baggy black school trousers, top 2 buttons undone, his tie done up very loosely, and his black school blazer tied around his waist, something the kids in primary school did. I couldn't help but roll my eyes. "What do you want?" I asked, walking off down the corridor, carrying my drama work.
"You know exactly what I want," he replied, walking beside me, hands stuffed in pockets.
"We'll leave you to it," my friends told me, walking off down one of the corridors, giggling.
"Yeah, and how many times have I told you that you're not going to get what you want." I told him irately.
"No need to get stressy with me. It's not as if I'm asking you to sleep with me, although if you decided that you wanted to do that, I'd be more than happy." I tutted. "Look Emma, all I'm after is one date. It's not going to kill you, you can even bring one of your friends along for moral support if you want." I shook my head.
"It's not about that, I just don't want to go on a date with you," I told him, getting more stressed.
"Come on Emmiepoos," he cooed, putting an arm around my shoulders and putting on a childish voice. "No need to get stressy now." I shook his arm off of me and stopped outside the drama studio, where we were both going for our next lesson, which was, unfortunately, together.
"Mattiepoos," I replied, in the same childish tone. "Go fuck yourself." I swung the door open and stormed into the classroom. Considering it was a drama class and was considered quite poncey for boys there were a surprising amount of boys in our class. Matt, being the prima donna that he consistently was, was of course one of them. The door swung shut and then swung open again as Matt let himself in. He walked over to me and I growled. "Look, what the hell have I got to do to get you to leave me alone?" I asked. He held up his hands, smiling.
"One date, and if you don't like it, then consider me gone." I sighed. I managed to stop myself giving in for near on 6 months now. Matt's 'obsession' had started just before we were about to sit our GCSE's, and now, we were a month into starting our AS courses. I cursed myself inwardly and looked up at him.
"Look, I'm not promising anything, but I'll think about it." I told him. He smiled triumphantly and walked over to his group of friends. James, one of this group and someone who I was very close to, looked over at me and gave me a sympathetic smile.

[the_admin]

It's great. Need more. Now.

Happy 1000th post by the way

[Kolakube]

lol, never noticed that!!!

That night as I was walking home fom school, I heard someone, shouting my name behind me. I stopped and turned to see James, running towards me. I smiled.
"How are you?" I asked as he walked beside me.
"I'm great," he replied. "Sorry about Matt," he said, looking me in the eyes. I shook my head.
"It's nothing I can't handle. I'll just go on the poxy date with him and it should all be over." James laughed.
"You do realise that he's actually, for once in his life, being serious about you. He never stops talking about you. He doesn't get weak at the knees around girls he fancies, he just has the gift of the gab," I laughed.
"I'll just tell him that he can take me to the cinema, then I get to watch the film while he tries to make a move." I cringed at the thought making James laugh.
"Anyway, I was wondering if we're still on for this weekend?" he asked. I nodded.
"Yeah, of course we are, as long as you're still okay with it." He nodded.
"So what time are you getting dropped off?" he asked.
"Saturday evening, 6:30." James nodded, taking in the information.
"And are you alright for getting picked up?" he asked.
"It's fine. It's all been sorted." I told him. We stopped outside the sweet shop and I kissed James' cheek.
"I'll see you tomorrow," I told him, walking in the shop. I picked up some chocolate then grabbed some Jelly Tots, paid and left the shop. As I walked back outside, I bumped into Matt. I stuffed the sweets in my bag and smiled at him.
"Hey," he grinned, standing awkwardly opposite me.
"Are you stalking me?" I asked, starting to walk slowly in the direction of the house. He walked beside me.
"No, I just saw you talking to James and I wanted to know if you'd thought anymore about that date I invited you on." When he didn't have a crowd to play to, he was really nervous. I shrugged.
"I dunno, when are you thinking of having it?"
"Oh, whenever you want. I'm not really that busy so any night is good for me," he told me eagerly. I couldn't help but smile.
"I'll look in my diary," I smirked. Matt smirked back and we stopped outside my front gate.
"So, are you gonna ask me in?" he asked, suddenly regaining his confidence.
"No," I smiled, opening the gate and walking down the path to the door. Matt stayed at the gate.
"Oh, come on. You've said you'll go on a date with me and you know nothing about me, we could get to know each other a little, then you'll find out if you want to worm your way out of the date." I shook my head at his desperation. I turned the key in the front door and looked at my watch. 4:00. I stepped in the house and turned back to him.
"You coming?" I asked. He grinned, let himself in the gate and ran to the open door. "You have 20 minutes," I whispered as he walked past me. I shut the door, kicked my shoes off, dropped my bag and walked into the lounge, Matt following behind me. He sat down on one sofa and I sat down on the one opposite.
"So, you have a really nice house," he commented, looking around.
"Cheers," I smiled. "Do you want a drink or anything?" I asked. He shook his head.
"I'm fine thanks," he smiled. We sat in silence for a little bit. "So, tell me about yourself," he said, turning towards me more. I laughed.
"Oh my god, that was cheesy," I giggled.
"I know, it sounded better in my head." I smiled. As much as I hated to admit it, he really didn't seem that bad at the moment. I jumped as I heard the front door to the house slam shut. I looked at my watch. It was only just gone 4 and I wasn't expecting anyone home until at least 4:30.
"We're home," came a little girl's voice from the hallway. I bit my bottom lip nervously and looked at Matt, who had confusion spread across his face. I suppose he was going to have to found out sooner rather than later. The door to the lounge opened and the girl ran in. Her blonde hair was tied up in short bunches and she was wearing jeans and a little pink T-shirt. She ran over to me, placed her hands on my knees and I leant down to kiss her.
"Did you have a good day at nursery?" I asked, noticing the dry paint spattered down her arm. She nodded.
"I drew you some pictures," she smiled up at me.
"You'll have to show me them later then." She nodded again, and noticed Matt.
"Mummy, who's that?" she whispered loudly. I looked at Matt and his eyes had nearly popped out of his head at the mention of the word 'mummy'. I took a deep breath and smiled at the little girl.
"This is Matt. He's mummy's friend from school." She nodded and I noticed Matt smile weakly at her. "Matt," he looked up at me, "This is Jazmine." He looked back at Jazmine and held out his hand.
"It's nice to meet you," he smiled. Jazmine took his big hand with her little one and shook it gently.
"Jazzie, If you ask Grandma to get my bag, there are some Jelly Tots in there for you. You can have some now." She cheered and ran out of the room to my mum leaving me and Matt in a deathly silence.
"So, that was a bit of a surprise," Matt said eventually. I nodded.
"No-one is supposed to know about her Matt, you can't even tell your mum. If it gets around the parents, it eventually gets round everyone and I don't want that. I just want her to be happy and not have to be the town gossip." He nodded.
"I understand, you can trust me, but I just don't get when it happened." I sighed.
"When I was 13, me and her father got drunk and ended up sleeping together. Do you remember when I moved away for about 6 months and then mysteriously moved back again?" I asked. He nodded.
"Was that when you had her?" I nodded.
"The only people who know the truth are my family, the people at the nusery, her father and her father's family."
"Who is her father?" he asked innocently. "I understand if you don't want to talk about it."
"It's not anyone that you'll know so it doesn't really matter." I told him. Jazzie let herself back in the room and ran back over to me. I lifted her on my lap and opened the Jelly Tots packet she was holding then handed it back to her. She started to eat the sweets quietly.
"She really does look like you," he told me, watching Jazzie. I looked down at her aswell. Instead of just putting the sweet in her mouth, she was putting her whole fingers in then letting go of the sweet when it was in her mouth. She took her sticky wet fingers out of her mouth and picked another sweet out of the bag and repeated the routine. "You both have those really beautiful blue eyes," Matt continued. I smiled.
"I can see that you're just trying to flatter both of us now," I giggled. He smiled as well.
"Look, I better make a move. Call me when you've made up your mind about the date," he said, standing up. I stood up as well, holding Jazzie on my hip.
"You mean you still want to go on a date." Matt nodded.
"Of course I do. The fact that you have a daughter doesn't alter the fact that I like you." I smiled and Matt quickly kissed my cheek. "I'll see you tomorrow," he said, hitching his bag on his shoulder.
"See ya," I smiled, shutting the door behind him.
"I like him," Jazzie said. Her mind still on the sweets she was eating.
"I know, sweetie. I like him too."

[Kolakube]

On Saturday night I got myself ready to go to James'. Jazzie was going to her dad's so I wouldn't have to worry about her on my date.
"Come on Jazzie, get ready. I promised James I'd be at his at 6:30 and I don't want to be late." I called in her room, pulling on a pair of jeans. I looked into her room more closely to see her sitting sadly on the edge of her bed. Her overnight bag was sitting next to her. "What's up sweetie?" I asked, walking in and sitting next to her on her bed. She looked up at me.
"I don't want you to get a new boyfriend." she told me sadly. "I want you and daddy to get back together." I sighed.
"I'm not getting a new boyfriend. I still love your daddy, but it's a different sort of love. He's a friend, but that doesn't mean we don't both love you." I told her, putting an arm around her.
"Can I come on your date with you?" she asked. I smiled and shook my head.
"You won't like it, you'll get really bored, plus, you and your daddy are going to have loads of fun together." She nodded. "Right, I have to go and put my shoes on, then we can go, is that okay?" I asked. Jazzie nodded and perked up a little bit. "Do you want to come and do the zips up on mummy's boots?" I asked. She nodded, jumped of the bed and raced me into my bedroom. When I got there, she was already holding the boots out to me.
"There you go," she smiled. I put the boot on and held my leg out so she could do the zip up. I pulled my jean leg back down and we did the other boot as well.
"Right, you go and get your bag, I'll meet you downstairs," I told her, pulling on a black blazer over my t-shirt. I walked down the stairs. My mum was waiting at the bottom. I grabbed a bag and put my phone and keys inside.
"So after we drop Jazzie off, how are you getting to your date?" she asked. Picking up her car keys.
"I'm walking." She nodded. I looked up as Jazzie made her way down the stairs. She jumped down the last two and smiled.
"Lets go!" She shouted. We walked out to the car, strapped her in her car seat and started the journey to her dad's house. When we got there, she ran to the front door, the moment I let her out of her car seat. As she tried to reach for the door bell. I said goodbye to my mum.
"If you want a lift home, just ring me," she told me. I nodded, slammed the car door and waved her off. I walked to the front door and lifted Jazzie up so she could ring the doorbell. She giggled as it rang. I placed her back down again. The door was flung open and Jazzie squealed with delight when she saw the person on the other side.
"Daddy!" she shouted, running towards him. He flicked his blonde hair out of his blue eyes and lifted her up.
"Hi!" he smiled. "How's daddy's little princess?" he asked.
"I'm fine," Jazzie replied, nestling her head on her dad's chest.
"And how are you?" he asked, turning to me.
"I'm great thanks." I replied. He nodded and stroked Jazzies hair.
"You look great as well," he continued, looking at what I was wearing. I smiled and handed him Jazzie's pink overnight bag.
"James, I need to have a quick word with you," he nodded and put Jazzie down on the floor.
"Go and find your Nan, I'll come and find you when I'm finished." She nodded and ran off into the house.
"Look, Matt found out about her." I told him.
"How?"
"Well he came round mine for a little in the week and they came home early. Jazzie's got really upset because she's realised that we don't live together and says we don't love each other. She doesn't want me to have another boyfriend."
"But I was never your boyfriend,"
"I know, but it's hard to explain that to her." He nodded.
"I'll talk to her if she seems to get upset while she's here."
"Cheers." I thanked him.
"So how are things between you and Matt?" he asked.
"I'm going on that date with him now," I told him.
"Now?" I nodded. "Well, have a nice time okay." I nodded again.
"I'll pick Jazzie up tomorrow evening, okay?"
"Course, see ya." James shut the door and I walked down the path in the direction of Matt's house.

[the_admin]

Aww! It's so sweet!!!

And I knew you didn't notice your 1000th post lol

[Kolakube]

I know, it's too close to my b'day and I'm pissed with my mates so I didn't notice. i wrote some fic instead!!!!

[the_admin]

YAY!

[Bitch*Goddess]

oh its so cool! who you pissed off with? what they done?

[Clazz]

Wow I love it hehe. Write moreeeeeeeeee!

[Kolakube]

short bit

When I arrived at the right place, I rang the doorbell and waited, shifted from side to side. Eventually, Matt flung the door open, pulling on a shoe as he did so.
"Hang on, I'm really behind, I fell asleep earlier so that's delayed everything I was doing," He explained quickly. I smiled. "Come in though," He continued, beckoning me inside. I stepped in the door and stood as he dashed around, sorting out things. Finally, he walked over and smiled at me.
"Ready?" I asked him with a grin. He nodded.
"Is pizza okay?" He asked, grabbing a jacket. I nodded. "Great, we can go to the new pizza restaurant in town." He paused. "You look great by the way." I smiled.
"So do you." He led me out of the door and we walked into the town centre. Usually the walk took me ages but today, it flew by. I could tell Matt was trying not to bring up the subject of Jazzie, but if he had, I don't think it would have bothered me. I was too happy.

[the_admin]

AWW! Keep it going dude (internet connection seems to have sorted itself ... weird)!! *thumbs up agaiiinnn*
(or maybe the inet connection has not sorted itself, fuckin@&#&#^@^@%!!*#$$&*@(@)#$)$&#^@~!. There, that shouold do it. GETTING SCARED NOW, EH, INET CONNECTION?!)

[Bitch*Goddess]

come on wirte some more! lol and on the sequel on too!!

[Kolakube]

When I arrived at the right place, I rang the doorbell and waited, shifted from side to side. Eventually, Matt flung the door open, pulling on a shoe as he did so.
"Hang on, I'm really behind, I fell asleep earlier so that's delayed everything I was doing," He explained quickly. I smiled. "Come in though," He continued, beckoning me inside. I stepped in the door and stood as he dashed around, sorting out things. Finally, he walked over and smiled at me.
"Ready?" I asked him with a grin. He nodded.
"Is pizza okay?" He asked, grabbing a jacket. I nodded. "Great, we can go to the new pizza restaurant in town." He paused. "You look great by the way." I smiled.
"So do you." He led me out of the door and we walked into the town centre. Usually the walk took me ages but today, it flew by. I could tell Matt was trying not to bring up the subject of Jazzie, but if he had, I don't think it would have bothered me. I was too happy. We walked into the Italian restaurant and Matt told the waiter we were here. He'd pre-reserved a table. When we sat down the waiter handed us some menus and left us together.
"So what have you done with Jazmine?" he asked, reading through the menu pages.
"She's with her dad," I replied, fiddling with my phone. I left it on so James could get hold of me if he needed to.
"Is her dad a nice guy?" he asked. I nodded.
"He's lovely,"
"We don't have to talk about this if you don't want. I'm just being nosy," he told me, placing his menu down.
"It's fine, I haven't been able to speak about Jazzie for 3 years, I need to get a couple of things off my chest." He smiled.
"So is he the same age as us or is he an older guy?"
"He's in the lower sixth as well." I sighed. I'd already lied to Matt when I said he didn't know the dad and now I didn't know if I was going to be able to cope with feeding him more stories. The waiter came back over and took our drinks orders then left us alone again. I suddenly felt that I had to tell Matt everything.
"So, does he look like Jazzie in anyway?" I nodded.
"Matt, I lied to you," I blurted out. He frowned.
"In what way?"
"You do know the dad. Jazzie has her dad's eyes and her dad's hair, she's so much like her dad."
"How do I know him? Does he go to our school?" I nodded. "Who does he hang around with?" I sighed.
"You." Matt paused for a moment.
"Me?" I nodded. "It can't be, my mates would have told me if they'd got a girl up the duff, wouldn't they?" he seemed to ask me.
"Well, you didn't know so they can't have told you."
"Who is it? I'm not going to hate you, I just want to know," he pleaded.
"James," I told him simply.
"James? My best mate James? James who I've grown up with since we were 4?" I nodded. "But when? How? How come I didn't know?" I shrugged.
"Everything happened so quickly, I don't think either of us knew what the hell was going on. It was at your New Years Party. The one where everyone was at your house because your parents had gone away. Your brother got the booze? Do you remember?" He nodded.
"But I was with James that night." I shook my head.
"No you weren't. You were trying to chat up that girl who was in your older brothers year. James looked lonely so I went over and spoke to him in the garden." I thought harder as I recalled events in my head.

[Kolakube]

"James!" I called out, walking over to the hunched up figure sitting on the wall at the end of the garden. He looked over his shoulder at me and smiled.
"Hey," he grinned as I sat next to him.
"You feeling a bit left out?" I asked him. "What with Matt trying to be all romantic. He'll never change," I giggled. James smiled.
"He's okay. His barks worse than his bite. Doesn't know when to give it a rest most times but he's still a cool guy." I smiled.
"You two are really close aren't you?" he nodded.
"We're like brothers."
"So you know each others secrets?" he nodded again.
"Pretty much. There's nothing I can't tell him," he smiled. The cold night air hit me and I shivered. I was only wearing a halter neck top so my back was freezing. "You okay?" James asked. I nodded.
"I'm just a bit cold, but I'll survive," I told him. James fidgeted a bit and then pulled his dark red hoodie over his head. He pulled it through so it was the right way round and then held it out to me.
"Here, put this on," he smiled.
"Are you sure? You'll freeze won't you?" I asked him, looking at the flimsly white T-shirt he had on underneath.
"I'm a big boy, I'll be fine, just put this on," he ordered. I took the hoddie gratefully and put it over my head. I pulled the sleeves down over my hands and held them under my chin. "You're still cold aren't you," he said, wrapping his arms around himself.
"I need time to warm up. You look freezing." He shrugged. I shifted up closer to him and snuggled up to him. At least that would keep him warm. He smiled and put an arm around me.
"So.........you got a boyfriend?" he asked casually. I smiled to myself.
"No, Why do you ask?" I giggled. He placed two fingers under my chin and pulled my face up level to his.
"I wanted to know if there was anyone who'd kill me if I did this," he smiled, leaning towards me. His lips caught on mine and I smiled. I felt myself blush as we pulled apart.
"That was really weird," I giggled nervously.
"Weird in a good way or in a bad way?"
"Good way." James grinned and planted another soft kiss on my lips. He picked a beer bottle up from next to him and drank some of it's contents.

"I didn't know James was drinking that night," Matt told me, interrupting me as I relayed the events onto him.
"He wasn't drinking that much, He wasn't pissed off his head, he was probably just a tiny bit tipsy," I explained. The waitress came back over and took our orders. We told her what we wanted and she left us alone again.
"So, carry on," Matt insisted.